Three months of acquaintance with Mr.

Chapter 1

You said, what will happen after death?

You say, do you really have a soul?

Is there really an afterlife, if any?

After I die, will I wander in the world, or will I go to reincarnation?Or just die like this?

I don't know the answer, and I don't know how to find it.

I don't care because I've lost myself.

who I am?where am I?What should I do?Who do I know?I do not know anything.

I looked at the familiar and unfamiliar streets, at the crowds, at the sun rising and setting at the west... I have nowhere to go, and the busy city is not my home.

I keep asking passers-by if they know me, even if they never answer me, I still enjoy it, after all, I don't know what to do other than this.

I constantly fantasize about brushing shoulders with my family or friends.

Later, I was tired.No matter what I do I get just ignored.

I know, I'm dead.Died of... died of when?Anyway, I don't remember.It doesn't matter either.

Maybe ghosts are like this, stupid people don't know anything.But why haven't I met my kind?Where are they all?

The strange thing is that I don't even feel lonely.Maybe my soul is used to being alone.

I decided to walk around.I want to find traces of my past in this world.I should have come to this world!I'm not sure myself.

I am walking aimlessly alone, but in fact I am not alone.I saw many human fireworks.

Crowds in the subway rush to their own future.

Newcomers in the church are taking oaths to each other.

The baby in the hospital was crying, but his family was laughing.

The uncles and aunts in the square are still graceful.

The tombstones are neatly arranged in the cemetery.

I have witnessed birth and death, I have seen hope and suffering, I have seen warmth and indifference.

I started wondering if I had been through this too.

Some people go out early and come back late for their livelihoods, some get drunk for love, some work hard for their dreams, some for... why?They do nothing, just live every day.

You say, am I that kind of person?

No, I seem to have never been here.I can't find any trace of my presence.

Am I successful?Am I married?Am I an elder? ...

If the answer is: I am married.

So what is my lover like?I'm so sorry I forgot about you.Look how stupid I am, I have lost myself.

I hope I can recognize you next time we meet.By the way I'm sorry again, my heart won't beat for you.

I'm dead, I don't have a heartbeat.

As for the roses I owe you, I don't know when I will be able to repay them.

Forget about me and find someone else who will buy you roses.That's fair, I forgot about you.

Until I was sad and sad, I met a person.

Allow me to revise my lines, I am reunited with a person.

Today is such a good day, I not only found my life, but also reunited with my...

what about me?I didn't know how to introduce him for a while.Let's call him Mr. He.

My Mr. He.Even if this title has not been recognized by me.

My name is Song Yijin, I am 22 years old, I have a secret crush, he is a man.

By the way, I probably forgot to tell you.I am also a man.

I know gays can't legally marry, but that's okay, I still like him.

If you like him, you must want to marry him, but if you like him, you may not be able to marry him.

I don't need to worry about it, because I am an exception, and I never thought of marrying him.

No, I made a mistake.I thought about it.but……

Well, how do I explain it to you?Let me think about it.

With that, marrying him is like a child wanting to meet Superman.

How about it?Is it naive and romantic?

But it's so unrealistic and far-fetched.

Now you know why I never thought I'd marry him!

Don't talk about those irrelevant things, after all I am dead, I will tell you the story between me and him.

I met him three months ago, and the story began in spring.

I was walking casually near the playground of A University, and suddenly a ball hit me next to me with great precision.

"Brother, please help kick it over."

I looked at the ball at my feet and did nothing.

"Brother, please help kick the ball over." Maybe he thought I didn't hear, the man repeated again.

"Okay, you wait."

It is said that every boy has a football dream in his heart, and I am naturally not exempt.However, that was the first time I had such close contact with football.

I helped kick the ball over.

To be honest, that feeling is novel, but not fascinating.Once the novelty wears off, nothing remains.Probably for me, I'm past the age of liking this kind of stuff.Maybe I never liked it, but I was just curious about what I couldn't get.

The ball was kicked out and I was thanked by the man.

The strange thing is that I don't remember the person who spoke to me, but I can't forget the person next to him who didn't make eye contact with me from the beginning to the end.

Probably because he is better looking.

Haha, that's right, I'm a dog.Come and hit me, you can't hit me anyway.But I guarantee that I really didn't see sex at the time.I just admire him for nothing.

Mr. He didn't wear a ball uniform, but black casual clothes.

It's really strange that I, a person who has to memorize English words for a long time, still have a deep memory of such an ordinary attire before I die.

True, I'm not very smart.I was admitted to University A mostly because of my hard work.

Why am I diligent?Because I have nothing to do!Had to learn to pass the time.

I like Mr. He very much, but I must admit that I did not fall in love with Mr. He at first sight.So we meet again.

Are you saying that God favors me?He sent such a good Mr. He to me.Do you say God has mercy on me?Let me meet a person who warms me in misfortune.Are you saying that God hates me?Let me not even have the right to pursue the person I love.

Later, I hid this love deeply in my heart.

Afterwards, even being by his side was a luxury for me.

Later, ah, I was finally freed.

Mr. He, I don't ask you to do anything for me.

It's not because I don't want to, nor because I'm kind, but because I don't have the qualifications.

Mr. He, I selfishly hope that you can remember me until you die.

In your memory, please define me like this:

a friend.

Don't add any adjectives, just leave it blank like this, making people daydream, and this is the only identity I can think of.

Also, I hope you can remember me.

My name is Song Yijin.

You are the only proof that I have been here, even if my existence is a misfortune.

Also, if I could do it all over again, I would hide before I met you, and then watch you secretly in the dark until I die.