about me and you

Chapter 3 Farewell

I've been waiting for you for a long time, this is enough, I still hope you are happy... I don't know what's wrong, what, I can't get together, I really want to kiss you, but I still don't, so let's stop here.

After eating, Fanhua Xiaopu said goodbye to Li Anan. There was a place where she ended her journey today. After chatting with Li Anan for so long, it was seven o'clock and the nightlife had just begun.

Hua Xiaopu rides the subway, listens to the familiar melody in the earphones, and looks at the reflection of herself on the subway door, feeling a little strange. Is that expressionless and lifeless person really me? She couldn't remember what she looked like. To be honest, she was really ugly.

After getting out of the subway, Hua Xiaopu walked against the flow in the opposite direction to the crowd. The more people left, the fewer people there, and the memory could not help but emerge. In fact, I wanted to come to that place a long time ago, but I never dared to come. It was the first time I came here. Sometimes I still want to come by myself, because I can't find the way, and the people in the same company are angry and want to go back home many times.

Walking on the familiar road, push open the inconspicuous door.

"Welcome to visit, what do you need?"

Hua Xiaopu saw that the seat she wanted to go to had already been taken by someone, she stopped in her tracks, and could only sit on the other side, and said lightly: "Cucumber juice."

"OK, wait."

It seemed to be her last time too. Hua Xiaopu watched the waiter return to the counter. She wondered if the person who came to the bar to order a glass of cucumber juice would impress her deeply. It took several phone calls to find this place. One ordered wine like a veteran of the wine shop, and the other ordered a glass of cucumber juice like a kid who went to the wrong door. The two finished their drinks relatively silently and left in a hurry .

In fact, they had already broken up at that time, but Hua Xiaopu still wanted to leave some memories of this bland love. Maybe at that time she had already thought that she was not a person who is not so easy to let go, so she didn't care about it. Her will brought her here, at least so that she could have a place to remember when she misses, but she didn't expect to have a place to remember, but she was also trapped in herself.

Hua Xiaopu wants to have a good memory once, and doesn't want to escape again, lying to others and lying to herself. It feels very tiring. Her ignorant appearance in her first love is really unpleasant. In an instant, he grew up a lot.

In fact, Hua Xiaopu disliked her duplicity. When they broke up, they said righteous words and talked about a peaceful breakup. After the breakup, they could still be friends. When the other party is no longer in his friend list.

Hua Xiaopu feels uncomfortable all over her body. This discomfort extends to her life. She only stops when she is busy at work every day. When she is not working, she is entangled and unable to move.

Broken-hearted, it's like being abandoned by the whole world. Hua Xiaopu is arrogant and arrogant. She likes to lie to others and also to herself. She really deceived herself at the beginning, and deleted all the contact information of the other party, and her memory is poor. Li didn't remember even more, as for the things she secretly took screenshots and kept locked in the space, she also deleted them in pieces, and there was only one thing left that could be kept.

With the blue liquid of cucumber juice, Hua Xiaopu isolated the outside world. She wondered if three years of separation is a long time. If a person has 60 years of life, three years does not account for one-tenth of the life. Time, counting the breakup times in the middle, the time they have been together is less than a year, that is to say, the time they have been apart now is so much longer than the time they have been together. If one day changes, No matter what counts, it is enough, after all, they have been separated for a long time, so long that they have forgotten their respective promises and their respective voices and smiles.

Huaxiaopu is keeping a promise alone. This promise is the end when Huaxiaopu turns 25, and today is the end.

"I will accompany you, no matter what happens, until the age of 25, I don't know whose life I will participate in the life after the age of 25, but I will always be with you until the life of the age of 25, no matter which way it is. "

Hua Xiaopu has fulfilled her promise, from breaking up at the age of 22 to the age of 25, she has not participated in any life. The three years have passed in a blink of an eye. Hua Xiaopu stubbornly guards the lonely city. There is no trace of people in the desolate lonely city. There is no reason to blame anyone, and I don't want anyone to talk about herself. She has hidden her secrets for the past few years, but she just doesn't want to hear anyone interfere too much with what she insists on. From the moment she decided From the beginning, when she was ready to pay for the promise, even if that person was no longer there, she didn't have the throbbing feeling for the other person, but she still guarded her lonely city until the end of the promise.

In the past three years, some things have already become a habit, and it is more confusing for Hua Xiaopu to suddenly give up a certain habit.

"Alone, do you want to go over and play together?" With a firm tone.

Hua Xiaopu looked at her and said nothing. The person who came was the proprietress of this bar, but she was in her thirties as if she was in her twenties. Hua Xiaopu didn't know the proprietress very well, but she had heard someone say it before. Yes, it seems that she is married to a man in the circle, and the proprietress opened the quiet bar in this circle with her partner. Occasionally, the husband who is married will come over, and everyone sits down and chats together.

Hua Xiaopu actually admires the proprietress very much, she knows what she wants, and she is steadfast for this idea.

"No, thank you, I'll just sit down and leave in a while." Hua Xiaopu returned the other party with a kind smile. In fact, as long as Hua Xiaopu is not alone, she still looks like a normal person. I won't offend anyone because of my own preferences, and others don't have any malicious intentions.

The proprietress is not reluctant, and she doesn't care about Hua Xiaopu's rejection. This circle is very inclusive, and people come to the door as customers, so she will say hello to Hua Xiaopu who looks lonely out of politeness.

Hua Xiaopu looked at the people around the tables next to her, she felt a bit lonely at the table by herself, but she didn't want to talk now, it's not bad to indulge herself like this, the number of people in the bar is gradually increasing When I got up, it was originally a quiet bar, but it became full of people. Because of the large number of people, and because special people found a special place, everyone showed their truest selves without reservation.

The smell of smoke wafted from the next table to Huaxiaopu's table. Huaxiaopu drank the last juice and paid the bill, and took a last look at that seat, as if the past and present time overlapped, she was still sitting there Drinking cucumber juice mixed flavors.

Maybe, she won't come to this place again in the future, Hua Xiaopu thought when she opened the door and walked out.

Hua Xiaopu thinks that if he likes someone, he will try his best to treat that person well, but how can he be good to that person?You think that you have given the other party all the good that you can give, but in the end the other party still yells at you hysterically that you don't understand her, and you are indifferent to her, and you are wronged and want to cry for yourself. I tried my best to treat you well with all my life, but at that time, I really didn't know that all the good things I did to you were not really good.

The wind in the evening was a bit cool, and the frozen Huaxiaopu's blood that had just been warmed in the bar became cold again, and even the blood that passed through the heart lost its temperature. Huaxiaopu suddenly thought of the problem of heart palpitations, and her heart was very Healthy, but she has lived for more than 20 years and suffered from heart palpitations several times. Several times, she felt that the heart would hurt until she went into shock before she could let it go. Before that, she only had heart palpitations every few years. Then once, but at a certain time three years ago, it happened one after another.

Every time she looked at the cold font on the screen of the phone, her dispirited heart suddenly lost her temper. She, the client, was not angry yet, but her heart became arrogant.It is recorded in medicine that the heart is a major organ in the human circulatory system. Its function is to promote blood flow and provide sufficient blood flow to organs and tissues for oxygen and various nutrients. Therefore, when the heart does not work, the brain is prone to lack of Oxygen became dull and drowsy, while Hua Xiaopu clutched her chest and clenched her teeth, she also weaved cold words to fight back at the other party. Only by retaliation in this way can her heart get a psychological balance and stop making trouble.

During that time, the pain was frequent, and one of the times was longer than usual, and the pain lasted for several 10 minutes.Hua Xiaopu wants to go to the hospital for a checkup. She is afraid that one day she will suddenly come and leave this colorful world for no reason. She is so unwilling. She still has something she needs to achieve. If it is so unknown Those who are not in vain may die with regret.

Later, Hua Xiaopu still didn't go to the hospital for an examination, so she never knew what was going on with her inexplicable chest pain. It's strange to say that since the pain that lasted longer than usual, she hasn't felt it until now. This kind of pain, it seems that the heart itself is also afraid of itself, and dare not to toss any more.

Later, Hua Xiaopu turned on the computer that he hadn’t used for a long time, and found an EX form that he had no impression of on the computer desktop. He clicked on it curiously, and there was a passage in it. Of course, the words were not written by Hua Xiaopu himself. It is very familiar. It turns out that the writing style that can be familiar with a person in the TV series really exists. She watched those few words for a long time, less than fifty characters, but she watched them for a long time. Except for the sudden panic, other things It never happened again, and she still deleted the form later, some things were wrongly seen at the best time, and it has no meaning anymore, so what if she saw it, it can only prove that she appeared and missed it again.

Hua Xiaopu walked away from the bar for a long time, got on the last train of the subway, and watched the black tunnel outside the subway door pass by quickly. Only by sticking to the door can I see the outside scenery. The reinforced concrete is gray. Seeing his own reflection on the door, his face was sullen and he didn't smile.

"I don't know what's wrong, but I can't walk anywhere, let's go here." Hua Xiaopu closed her eyes and thought.