Pain fetish

Chapter 49 "I want to have a home with him"

Seven o'clock in the evening on February 27th.

The sleet that lasted for a day and night has just stopped, and the whole world is covered in wet and sticky rain and snow. Clothes and hair stick to the skin and scalp. The air is bitingly cold, as if the smell of rotting blood permeates the tip of the nose.

Qi Chuan waited outside the ward for three hours, while Fu Ge called Qi Han 68 times in the ward.

He was packing his things, the only leftover luggage that was of no value and did not need to be taken away, including tissue paper with lisianthus flowers printed on it, a bear dinner plate and a bunch of cartoon hand warming eggs.

And Fu Ge would tirelessly ask every time he put away something: "Ahan, do you want to take this away?"

He repeated the same words 68 times, but he never waited for someone to answer.

Until Qi Chuan pushed open the door that seemed to separate reality from fantasy, and called him in a hoarse voice: "Xiaoge, it's time to go, grandpa is waiting for us."

Fu Ge didn't even turn his head. His thin waist bent down to get something, and his tone was as stagnant as a pool of stagnant water: "Wait, it's almost three o'clock."

Qi Chuan: "What happened at three o'clock?"

Fu Ge: "He came to bring me French fries at three o'clock. Today is honey butter flavor."

This is a habit and a little secret between him and Qi Han. Every afternoon at three o'clock, Qi Han would knock on his window on time and steal a portion of French fries to feed him under the doctor's nose.

It's almost three o'clock and his fries are almost here.

But Qi Chuan said: "He won't come today, and he won't come in the future."

The hand closing the clothes hanger paused for a second. Fu Ge didn't raise his eyes, but said softly, "Impossible. He is very punctual. He comes every day. He asked me to wait for him this morning."

Qi Chuan's eyes were red, he took a deep breath and said loudly: "That happened the morning before yesterday, and he has been arrested now."

With a "bang", the hanger in his hand fell to the ground. Fu Ge blinked helplessly, his face was as dazed as if he had just woken up from a big dream: "Already...arrested..."

"Yes, you got married yesterday. According to the plan, the police arrived 15 minutes after the wedding and took him away."

Fu Ge stood there motionless, staring into the distance with empty eyes for a long time, and finally pulled back his gaze with difficulty, "I see, I forgot..."

His memory was confused again, to the point where he completely forgot what happened yesterday, and the last save in his head was still that Qi Han asked him to eat French fries the morning before yesterday.

"Then... don't you have any French fries today..." Fu Ge looked at the little bear's dinner plate and thought to himself, I have already prepared the plate.

Qi Chuan closed his eyes, and took out the digital planet brooch from his pocket, "If you want to eat, I will buy it for you later. The most urgent thing now is to help you restore your memory."

"Don't—" Fu Ge dodged Qi Chuan's hand, his dull eyes flashed past the vague phantom in the corner, and he said, "Don't bother, I don't really want to remember."

Qi Chuan was taken aback, followed his line of sight to look at the empty corner, and understood, "Xiaoge, are you hallucinating again? Did you see him again? What did he say to you?"

"Well, so what if you see it, is it important?"

"Of course it's important. As your psychiatrist, I must fully understand your mental state."

Fu Ge remained silent, dazed for a long time and suddenly raised his eyes to look at the corner again, the vague phantom was reaching out to him, his pale lips trembling.

Little Beta repeated: "He said, congratulations on the baby being discharged from the hospital, we can finally go home together."

Fu Ge sat in the car, lit a cigarette, and the wind blowing from nowhere covered his face with unmelted snow.

Ashes is backward, he is forward, people are moving forward, but the heart can never keep up.

"Go home first or buy French fries first?" Qi Chuan asked.

Fu Ge thought for a long time and said, "Let's go back to the winery first."

"What are you doing back there? It's over."

Fu Ge didn't answer, but suddenly asked, "Did I have fun yesterday?"

The reddish eyes suddenly lifted up, and Qi Chuan looked at him from the rearview mirror: "Well, you drank and danced yesterday."

"Ah, so, that should be happy."

The hand holding the steering wheel tightened suddenly, what Qi Chuan didn't say was: Your dance was done in the snow.

The snow fell heavily, Fu Ge danced for a long time, the rain and snow mixed with Qi Han's blood in the lawn, he lay on it after dancing that dance, motionless, sluggish like a walking dead.

Fu Ge had a high fever because of the snow, and fell asleep for a day and a night. Qi Chuan just woke up when he came to find him.

Qi Han was arrested, and all related assets under his hands were frozen. Only this winery survived, so what was the scene when the wedding was aborted, it is still what it is now.

"Is no one cleaning up here?" Fu Ge asked looking at the mess on the ground.

Qi Chuan said: "The guests left soon after the accident, and the wedding company only took some of the things because it was unlucky. return."

Fu Ge smiled wryly, "It's really bad luck."

His first wedding was ruined by Qi Han, and his second wedding was ruined by himself. Maybe he was destined to be alone in this life.

Qi Chuan was silent, and took his shoulder, "Shall we go back first? Grandpa is still waiting at home, or do you want to find a quiet place?"

Fu Ge didn't respond, he just walked silently to the rose path he designed, and picked out the garbage that fell inside one by one.

Although the rain melted most of the snow, the rose avenue was still covered with a not-so-thin layer. Fu Ge stuck his fingers into it and soaked in it, and was frozen to the bluish white, but he acted as if he couldn't feel it. .

Qi Chuan looked at his background from behind, and suddenly felt that Fu Ge was also like a broken rose.

It was broken off at the wrong flowering period, and it was submerged in the gutter for many, many years. It was hard to wait until the moment of seeing the sun again, but it was covered tightly by a layer of snow.

He finally waited for his own flowering period, but withered forever.

"Xiao Ge, what are you doing?" Qi Chuan's voice was hoarse.

Fu Ge's complexion was terribly pale, but his eyes and nose were red from the cold, and he looked as if he was crying, but Qi Chuan knew that he would not, at least today, he would not allow himself to shed a single tear.

You can only laugh if you can't cry. His smile is too ugly. His thin hands dig out a rose from the snow. His bloodshot eyes are so desperate and pitiful, as if his last breath is dying. broken.

"You go back first, I want to go somewhere by myself."

Fu Ge brought three things, an unopened bottle of wedding wine, a box of unsoaked wedding cakes that were blocked by the table, and a handful of Julieta flower balls that he made himself.

These things were carefully placed in front of Qi Ji's tomb, next to the invitation card left by Qi Han that night, there are so many things representing the wedding, and now they are all in place.

Fu Ge wiped the snow off the tombstone with his sleeve, and didn't dare to look at Qi Ji's photo. He sat with his back to the tombstone, lit a cigarette and pressed it on his left wrist, which was almost scalded by the cigarette butt.

"I'm sorry I shouldn't be lighting your cigarette, but there's nothing else I can do to stay awake."

He just burned the cigarette and put it out. Instead of throwing it on the ground, he put it in his pocket, and there was no more sound after that.

The floor under him was very cold, and the wind in the cemetery was bleak. Fu Ge looked up at the gray sky, lost his mind for a long time, and finally opened his mouth: "Yesterday...we got married, and he was taken away by the police."

"I know I shouldn't appear in front of you again, but I... I have nowhere else to go... I can't find my father's grave..."

After Fu Ge's biological father died, he left him a large inheritance besides daily expenses, which he could not inherit until he was an adult.

Fu Zhenying, the adoptive father, kept concealing his father's burial place in order to defraud the inheritance. Fu Ge would rather agree to go to accompany Qi Han to drink with Fu Zhenying than to meet Fu Zhenying just to find out where his father's cemetery is.

But Qi Han lied to him.

Until Fu Zhenying was executed, he didn't let Fu Ge meet. Little Beta lost his last chance to find his father.

"We haven't seen each other for 16 years. I don't know where he is buried. I can't find it anyway. Is there anyone going to visit him during Qingming and cold food? When it snows, does anyone help him wipe the snow on the tombstone? I have two knots." The second marriage, the two times I don't know where to send the invitation, so many years, has he thought about me..."

Fu Ge buried his face in his knees, tightly clutching an undelivered invitation, "Uncle Qi, I miss Dad so much, but I don't even have a picture of him..."

Fu Ge's father passed away unexpectedly when he was seven years old, and Fu Zhenying took over the family with full power. The only memories left to Fu Ge are some old toys and a few photo albums.

But later Fu Zhenying's crimes were revealed, Fu's family was raided, and the court only allowed him one day to get back his worthless belongings, but Fu Ge failed to go back, and he was locked in a small building by Qi Han.

When I came out, the photo album was gone, the toys were gone, the home was gone, and others were crazy.

He wanted to draw a portrait of his father, but he couldn't pick up a pen anyway. When he could pick up a pen again, the face in his memory was already blurred.

"I used to hear people say that when a child is going to do something big, he has to report it to his parents and elders in advance. It's like making a wish. Whether it is done or not in the future, you have to come to fulfill the wish. Ahan can't come, so I will replace him."

He didn't dare to turn his head until this moment, and pushed the wedding cake and wedding wine forward a bit, "I made the wedding cake, and he picked the wedding wine. Some of them are damp. Don't be disgusted, eat some."

A large handful of wet roses next to it was about to freeze over, Fu Ge rubbed the petals apart with the warmth of his palms, and showed Qi Ji when he was done.

"Do you know what kind of rose this is?"

Fu Ge asked himself and answered: "Julietta, he planted it himself."

After returning from Litang, Qi Han started planting. For this reason, Qi Han also found someone to build a professional flower shed, watering and fertilizing every day, and maintaining it day and night. After two periods of planting, the hundreds of plants with the most beautiful colors can be raised. .

Tangerine on the inside and pink on the outside, the petals are gathered together, just like Fu Ge's lips, like plump peach pulp.

"He showed me the flowers on the day of success." Fu Ge recalled the scene that day, opened his arms and gestured, "Holding such a big handful, there are still mud on the trouser legs, but he is so happy like a fool, so excited." I didn't sleep well all night, and I was talking about those flowers in my dreams."

Fu Ge suddenly laughed, "He's so happy, really happy. I haven't seen him smile so happily for a long, long time. Just like me back then, I was desperately looking forward to this wedding."

"Of course I won't let him down..."

Little Beta closed his eyes and said hoarsely, "Don't worry, he won't suffer much, I have planned it."

The time when the police arrived, the route they came in, the seats of the guests, and the petals that were deliberately blown into the air with a blower, Fu Ge led people to rehearse many, many times to ensure that the longest time from the delivery to the end would not exceed 10 minutes.

"It's like a nightmare, a string of revolving lanterns before death, just like... what I experienced back then, it will end soon, he won't hurt, it won't hurt very much..."

As he was talking, he suddenly stopped, and Little Beta suddenly choked up his throat, and his dazed eyes were soaked in mist, as if he couldn't figure it out: "I planned everything, he shouldn't...be in such pain... ..."

The fuzzy memory is like a sharp steel wire, splitting his mind into countless fragments, yesterday's scene reappeared on each fragment like a reappearance of a dream, Fu Ge was like being shrouded in a huge bell, letting those fragments swarm Then, it pierced his heart and eyes.

Qi Han's head was smashed with a baton, his legs were broken, and he was pushed to the ground and beaten. He dragged his body and crawled towards him, begging himself to put on a ring, and was arrested again and forced to kneel on the ground. , Ask yourself if you have been lying to him from the beginning to the end...

Then the clock was smashed, blood staining the shards.

Fu Ge choked up and said: "He vomited a lot of blood, especially a lot, on the arch, the heavy rain last night didn't wash his blood away, maybe it's because I told him that I burned his savings s things."

"But I have destroyed many of his things, burned them, smashed them, why only this time...he looks so desperate..."

Those blood-smeared eyes were completely dimmed, as if they would never be stirred up again, and they couldn't even be called eyes anymore, like two blood holes used to store pupils.

"I don't know what is in that room. I stole his key and took a peek. The time was too short, and I only saw the house number."

Fu Ge didn't know that Qi Han already knew his plan like the back of his hand, and he didn't know that the 404 of Shengde Hospital was a relic saved by Qi Han.

He only saw the phrase "In my short and barren life, all the joys" on the door plate, and he made up his mind to destroy the things in this room.

"I have become like this, why should he be happy..."

As soon as the two left the hospital and rushed to the wedding scene, he asked someone to break open the door, took out all the contents and burned them up.

"This is the only one left." Fu Ge took out a palm-sized, boxy kraft paper bag from his pocket, and handed it to the tomb. "I didn't read it, and I didn't burn it. I'll leave it for you to remember."

He stood up, bowed one last time, and turned to go.

The kraft paper bag was suddenly blown by the wind into a snow pit with accumulated water. Fu Ge hurried to pick it up, but the side that fell into the water was still soaked.

Fearing that the contents inside would also get wet, he opened the paper bag and poured the contents on his hand, and a silk ribbon with a prayer wheel hanging on it rolled out. It was the white hada bracelet that Qi Han made for him.

"Why here... Didn't I throw it away..."

With a trembling heart, Fu Ge immediately put his hand into the paper bag, and pulled out a piece of old silk paper from under the bracelet.

He made it back then, and put it in the picture album to prevaricate Fu Zhenying's piece of juan paper.

On the front is his painting of Qi Han, on the back is Alpha's newly written handwriting, and the folded first half reads——

[Actually, I also made myself a bracelet, but I didn't dare to wear it.

Because Xiaoge said that the bracelet can bless people with a long life, but I can't, I'm going to die, and the wedding is the last deadline he left for me.

My little song hates me to the bone. She has been planning for many years, but this is the last step. I want to help him, and I can't let him go too hard. 】

With a stiff fingertip, Fu Ge's breathing and heartbeat stopped suddenly.

The body wrapped in the down jacket was like falling into an ice cave, and the boiling blood flowed back from the soles of the feet to the top of the head, almost bursting those unbelievable eyes.

"what happened……"

"How could this be...he...he knows..."

"Why would he know..."

He knows I hate him, knows my plan...knows that I want to kill him...knows that I want him to die from the beginning to the end?

Then why, still jump into my trap...

Suddenly a gust of wind blew up on the top of the mountain, rolling snow and hitting the tombstone.

Fu Ge fell to the ground as if he lost his strength, like a Juliette frozen by ice and snow and snapped in the wind, its petals fell and its core withered.

Snow particles fell to the ground in piles, and tears fell drop by drop on the snow. Fu Ge desperately wiped his wet face with his frozen hands.

His eyes were blurred with tears and he couldn't see clearly. He frantically picked up the water-soaked silk paper and unfolded the folded lower half little by little.

The blurred handwriting gradually became clear in the field of vision——

[After the wedding, I will surrender myself.

I knew he was going to be unable to continue acting, even if he touched the corner of my clothes, he couldn't help vomiting.Moreover, the sale of glands has a huge impact. I am afraid that he will be implicated by me if he does not plan well.

No matter how inevitable the death penalty is, I deserve it.

The relics have been packed and stored in Room 404. I hope Chen Xing can help me collect them for burial and bury them far away from him.

On the night of Genie Shenshan allergic reaction, before dying, I looked at the back of Xiaoge riding away and thought, otherwise, I would stop struggling.

If God is willing to give me an afterlife, maybe those things can no longer appear in my life.

I don't want to be beaten, I don't want to be afraid of needles, I don't want my father to die in front of me, I don't want to have a susceptible period, I don't want to lose control again, and I don't want to... bully him...

I just want to be an ordinary, slightly normal person.

I really miss, miss, and love him.

I want to have a home with him. 】

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I have been asked a lot before, can Xiaoge really be happy after his revenge is successful? In fact, what he wants is never happiness. He just wants to heal the hatred and live this life quietly, maybe decades, maybe dozens of days , no longer need to be awakened by nightmares.

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ps: I changed the cover!I changed the cover!I changed the cover!Please brag!Ask for a starfish!