don't like me

Chapter 32 Piano Songs

I never thought in my life that I would be able to participate in campus activities.

Thanks to Wen Zhixu.

I drove here after get off work, and there were some parents standing at the gate of the campus. Their children were about to perform on stage, and no one wanted to miss the opportunity to appreciate it.

I haven't seen Wen Zhixu yet, but I saw her teacher at the gate. It wasn't the music teacher, but Wen Zhixu's class teacher. I met him during a home visit. We communicated well at that time, so I dare not say how much I have. Well, I can only say that the other party doesn't hate me.

The head teacher saw me and greeted me, and asked me when I just arrived. I said yes, and she explained that she was helping at the door and the reason for the event. Many parents were here, so she could come and give directions and help.

I also learned of Wen Zhixu's whereabouts from her mouth.

In the last rehearsal in the piano room, Wen Zhixu was present, the music teacher sat in front and played piano music, and the students stood straight in a row and sang the same song.

This kind of picture is very harmonious, it is the leisurely feeling of the quiet years, there is no secular dispute, and we work together for a goal. In the front is a leader who teaches you, and in the back is the person you want to cultivate carefully. You help each other and play a song. The hymn of peaches and plums.

Wen Zhixu stood inside, but didn't open her mouth to sing along. It wasn't that she didn't want to, but that she couldn't. I know that she expected more than anyone else, that she could be normal, that she would be like everyone else.

But her brother was helpless.

I stood outside the window with gray eyes. There are too many uncontrollable things in this world, and my ability is limited. How can I protect them in all directions without any dead ends?Is there a way to do that?Tell me and I will definitely do it.

At the end of the song, the teacher stood up, clapped his hands, and said that the students sang very well.

I walked in at this time and said, "The teacher taught well."

When the music teacher heard the sound, she turned her head and met my sight, and asked me why I came here in amazement, she was confused, wasn't she invited by her?

"I forgot." The teacher pointed to the chair and said, "Sit down."

"I'm not here to sit around." I glanced at Wen Zhixu and asked, "Why did you let her participate?"

This thing is like you let the dumb talk.

Wen Zhixu wanted to come over, but seeing that I didn't wave to her and was talking to her teacher, she didn't dare to come over and watched from a distance.

The teacher parted her hair and said, "She is a member of Class Seven and should join the army."

Even if she doesn't make a sound, let her stand in the queue, right?Unable to be taken care of by the teacher, I raised my hand at Wen Zhixu. She had wanted to run over a long time ago, and she would tiptoe to me.

She is timid, and even more exaggerated in front of others.

I put my arms around her shoulders and said to the teacher, "What time do you start?"

The teacher raised her hand, and there was a small watch on her wrist. She touched the dial and said, "There is still half an hour, and I will prepare 10 minutes in advance. You can enter first."

"It's okay, I'll stay with her for a while, you are busy first."

I took Wen Zhixu out.

The people who moved to the event venue one after another, visually, there are quite a few parents alone. This event is a little bigger than I imagined.

What am I doing with her?Relieve her tension?Let's put it this way, I said, "Do you want to go on stage?"

The little girl next to her nodded.

I said, "People come on stage to perform, what are you doing? Let your brother see you?"

She didn't respond to me with any action.

I rubbed her head and encouraged her: "Try it." I wanted her surprise, even if it was just an inarticulate hum.

She leaned a little tighter against me.

If who I rely on and why I persist until today, then this girl is one of the meanings.

"Mom misses you, take a rest tomorrow to see her."

She didn't speak, lowered her head, and stopped in her tracks.

"With me here, there is nothing to be afraid of."

She raised her head, fear still in her eyes.

There are a lot of troubles around me, but I don't want to mention them, such as the relationship between mother and daughter.

I know that the world is so big, there are always some things that don't go your way, but in the most basic relationship, can there be less entanglement?They are my destiny, the calamity that I must go through in this life, sometimes I think, am I here to pay off the debt?

If you don't finish it, you will use it for a lifetime, and then you will come to another life. After you have finished paying it, you will be free and get out of the sea of ​​suffering.

I no longer expect other beautiful dreams, I am always awake, I don’t think I am depraved, I have the ability to live a better life, but I don’t want to pursue it, it’s meaningless, enough to eat and dress warmly, The energy is low, I hope that after being busy, the spare time can be used to sleep, have a good dream, and rest.

The success and fame that I once pursued have been crossed out of my mind, and the enthusiasm I once had was also returned to my youth.

Quite fulfilling, right now.

That's enough.

When the show started, I went in and found a seat not near the front.It was not Wen Zhixu's turn yet, and he forgot to ask about the order of appearance, so he could only wait in peace.

Most of the singing and dancing, less small plot performances, the audience who were amused and laughed, cheered and gave great support. It seemed that I was the only one who was motionless. The voices around me were noisy, and I fell into the noise.

What followed was a personal singing, "You at the Same Table", which awakened everyone's memories of their school days.

Close your eyes, leaning on the seat behind you, a word rang in your ears, it was a soft "I like you."

There is nothing so earth-shattering, and there is no need for gorgeous words to embellish that heart. The joy of young people is as simple as that. I once moved my heart all night because of one sentence.

I didn't let him come to the piano room to listen to my piano practice. It was the first time he enjoyed my piano music, and it was also in this kind of school celebration. Under the stage, selfless surrender entered the melody.

He said, that was actually not the first time he heard me play the piano. I asked him eagerly when was the first time.

That was when I didn't know him yet.

Sitting in the auditorium with his classmates, he heard my name and applauded. In fact, he didn't know much about me at that time, that is, he followed the crowd and praised me as a cadre.

But later, he told me that the first time he realized the gap between us was because of the piano piece, the lights on the stage complemented each other, and I sat firmly in the dim blues, the piano in front of me was an isolated Our sharp sword, piercing awakened his arrogance and randomness towards me.

He quieted down, and everyone around him, it was not me who soothed them, but the music in his hand, the melody floating in the sky.

I love gentle melodies. In an impetuous world, I like gentle comfort that penetrates into my heart. The songs I play and the meaning of my reading are self-attracting, and I never want anyone's understanding and appreciation.And manic people are willing to sit down and listen to me, which is something I am grateful to this day.

Thank them for their cooperation.

Later, the boy kissed my fingertips, touched my lips, squeezed me into a dark corner, hugged my body, shyness and nervousness made my hands sweat, and I clenched the curtain tightly. Panting in my arms.

He let me admire my appearance, but I don't want to, I know I'm in a mess right now, he's always been a bad-hearted person, luckily he didn't do anything excessive, otherwise I might die in his arms.

"I like you." I have heard it countless times, many times, with thousands of words and the same pattern, but every time he said, my heart trembled.

Don't blame me for being easily moved, my ears are soft, I am young and ignorant, it is easy to like, easy to fall in love, every person around me who treats me well, I can't wait to do my best to repay him.

Even liking is the same.

"Well, I know, I like you too."

I like you too.

Like is a wonderful feeling, his touch, his gaze, his casual provocation, you have to surrender.

Why not?I believed that he liked me at that time, and I still believe that now, what I rejected was only now, not him, but myself.

Gu Ming said, it was so easy for me to be tempted.

Yes, I admit, it is so easy for me to be tempted, because it is not someone else, because it is him, it is easy for me to be tempted.

I was only 19 years old that year.

In the past ten years, I have seen couples hugging each other and questioning each other. I have also seen couples who fell in love and left decisively.

Likes are not worth a few dollars, and the prestige of words, you think it is a seductive emotion when you say something to me. When you uncover the fig leaf, what you see is a short-lived freshness, a momentary favor.

Don't think of yourself as special, it's just a momentary illusion after hormonal collision.

Be a little more pathetic in the first place, and you may not be so devastated.

A little advice, but it is necessary for my life for ten years.

So, I can't blame him.

It's me who doesn't live up to expectations.

I like him, at my own risk.

The announcer finally called out to Class [-], and everyone related to him was enthusiastically giving encouragement. Wen Zhixu stood at the original position and walked onto the stage in an orderly manner. In front of the prepared piano, a girl in a long skirt The teacher sat down gracefully.

The students were all ready, and they were only waiting for the teacher's instructions. The girl who was trying to maintain a stable mood was going through an ordeal.

I didn't give her comfort, I knew that one of my actions could make her feel at ease, but I didn't give it.

How long can I stay with her?Can you do it in every possible way?Can keep her life?Can appear by her side when she has any difficulties?Or can I let her walk into the society and hide under my arms for the rest of her life?If there is one of them that I can't do, I have to let go, I have to let her go.

Don't harm her, learn to be yourself, learn to be alone, today's class, learn how to digest your own panic.

It's hard for you, I know, but I believe in you.

I stared sternly at the situation on the stage. I didn't notice the person next to me. I just waited for that person to sit down, folded his legs gracefully, looked forward, and said: "Grow up."

I just turned my head away.

He never looked sideways at me, just stared at the girl on the stage without saying a word.

Yes, today is the first time he sees her after so many years, and he will definitely be pleasantly surprised. The follower behind him, the little girl who trusts him like me, will be happy if she knows that he is coming.

"Long time no see," Yang Xiao said softly, "It's not what I remember."

I stared at the stage, no response.

For a moment, I couldn't tell whether this was the present moment or the past memories.

I couldn't tell whether he was referring to me or Wen Zhixu on stage.

And he raised his hands and applauded, and the performance began.