Xi Yin

Chapter 26

"Why hasn't Zhou Nan come here? I'm hungry..." Chen Huai curled up on the sofa, touching Qin Chuji's calf with her toes, "I want to eat."

Qin Chuji grabbed the rebellious foot and stuffed it back for him, "Come on Zhou Nan later, restrain yourself a bit, don't be so intimate with me."

"What? You're so old, who else do you want to have a relationship with?!" Chen Huai sat up straight, and pulled his tie close to him, "Do you not love me anymore, I want to sue my mother..."

Qin Chuji flicked his forehead, "Play with me again... Just pay attention later."

When Zhou Nan really came in with big bags and small bags, Chen Huai knew he should restrain himself even without Qin Chuji's orders.Also in the prime of life, Zhou Nan inherited the Shengda Group after an inexplicable serious illness five years ago. He is busy with various complicated affairs, looks haggard and weak, and hardly resembles his peers

"Oh, old Zhou, why are you getting more and more gray hair? You're only 35, so what should you do in the future?" Chen Huai took the things in his hand, and casually pulled his hair on the side, under the gray layer It was full of silver threads, "Have you been to the doctor? Otherwise, I will accompany you tomorrow, just to rest."

Zhou Nan greeted the two of them, and waved his hands to perfunctory him, "No, it's nothing serious." After seeing a lot, he also knew the reason. He was anxious all night and couldn't sleep, and his kidney yang was depleted. Over time, it became like this look like

Qin Chuji set up a table full of dishes, "Sit down quickly. You must be hungry, let's eat something first."

"There was a traffic jam on the road, so it was delayed for a while." Zhou Nan sat down and took the chopsticks, "Actually, you don't have to wait for me, you can start first."

"How can I? I'm not that kind of person." Chen Huai put a piece of meat on his plate, "Try this, I made it."

"Very good, good workmanship." Zhou Nan said vaguely. He was actually very grateful to Chen Huai and Qin Chuji. Over the years, if these two people hadn't always missed him and invited him to sit at home from time to time, he was finally a little bit embarrassed. The feeling of caring, no one died alone in the apartment.Every time he came, the two of them kept a considerate distance, lest he see a little intimacy and feel emotional, and think of the other person...

But how can that person forget so easily?

"Tomorrow is the anniversary of Mingjie's death. I'll go out of the city to see him." Zhou Nan didn't look up, as if he was talking to himself, "I have dealt with almost all the matters in the company a few days ago, and I have handed over everything that can be handed over to my elder brother. , he is more suitable than me to do these things... I will not come back when I go out this time."

"Not coming back means..." Chen Huai and Qin Chuji looked at each other, "Where are you going?"

"Don't worry, I just won't be staying in City C anymore." Zhou Nan smiled, fine lines formed at the corners of his eyes, "Go to places with beautiful mountains and rivers all over the country, and wherever you go, you can't walk anymore, just settle down there."

Only then did Chen Huai breathe a sigh of relief. Just for a moment, he really thought that Zhou Nan was going to do something stupid, "You...don't wait?"

"Yeah." Zhou Nan smiled even better, "I'm stubborn, I clearly saw the corpse being pushed to be cremated with my own eyes, but I still refused to believe that he died like that... Now that I'm stubborn enough, I won't wait for him. "

Zhou Nan’s throat was swollen, and some words still remained unspoken. Recently, he felt that he was a little old, and his memory and metabolism slowed down, and he began to become more and more nostalgic. When walking on the street, he saw people with similar backs, and always chased them in front of them. To make sure, you can only recover when you are pushed away by someone scolding you for being crazy. Sitting in the room at night watching TV, you suddenly want to talk to someone. When you speak, you will be startled by your own voice. He heard himself say, "Mingjie, look at this, it's so stupid. But you did this when you were young, it's really funny..." Liao's voice gradually faded away, and no one answered

... boring ...

He just thought so, and there are more and more boring things, eating, sleeping, bathing, changing clothes... The simple things that used to make him exhausted every day, he felt so tired, he couldn't cry because he was so tired, he didn't know why ... Vaguely, he wondered if he was suffering from depression. This idea popped up, which immediately made him laugh out loud. He shouted

"Mingjie, I finally fell ill... come and see me."

--still no answer--

It's so boring to live like this

"Zhou Nan—Old Zhou!" Chen Huai waved his hands in front of his eyes, "I'm back to myself." After speaking, he turned his head and complained to Qin Chuji, "Let's just say this movie is boring."

"No, I'm too tired." Zhou Nan shook his head, looked at his watch, and then got up, "The movie is over, I have to go back and collect my things."

Qin Chuji stood up, "Let's go, we will see you off."

"Don't." Zhou Nan stopped, "You sit down, I'm most afraid of others seeing me off, I'm embarrassed." He walked to the door, put on his shoes and straightened up, his eyes were frighteningly bright, "Thank you for always taking care of me, I will always be happy." Remember."

"Don't say that, it's like a farewell... The mountains don't turn around, and we will see you if you don't come back. We will meet again." Chen Huai patted him on the shoulder and confirmed, "Right?"

Zhou Nan just laughed and didn't answer, "Go in, I'm leaving."

He entered the corridor, his figure disappeared between the stairs, and there was an electronic sound from afar, which was Zhou Nan walking out of the unit

There was still worry in Chen Huai's eyes, "Will we see you again?"

"Yes." Qin Chuji pressed a kiss on his forehead, "Go in."

Zhou Nan called a taxi when he came, but he didn’t want to take a car when he came back. He just paced slowly, walking between the lights on and off. The night wind was cool and the people on the road were very lively. The young girl who followed followed the fat and chunky boss, covering her mouth with her hands with disgust when she walked past the food stall; the pregnant woman with swollen lower limbs was wearing hole shoes, and her husband with a loose hairstyle stopped in front of the barbecue stall, wanting to eat but Being dragged away abruptly; the child running around with a small bag hanging on his body, the rope was dragged in the hands of his parents, and his grandparents followed him like a small army... Something rubbed his calf, and Zhou Nan looked away Looking down, a big golden retriever wagged its tail against him. The owner of the dog was a young boy, wearing glasses and a pullover sweater. His face was flushed as he ran with the dog

Zhou Nan remembered that many years ago, Sheng Mingjie also ran in wearing a sweater, panting heavily, his face was flushed, and he leaned against the door for a long time before breaking into fine sweat. He was afraid of dogs, so he hid when he saw it, but he met a sassy one. He chased him as soon as he moved, and drove him all the way back to the dormitory. At that time, Zhou Nan laughed so hard that he couldn't breathe, "That dog is not as big as your shoe, why run? You are sick!", Sheng Mingjie just kicked He, laughing like infected, collapsed on the chair

Zhou Nan stroked the golden retriever's head, "It's so good." He thought, no matter how big a dog is, as long as Sheng Mingjie sees it, he must run to the next intersection to wait for him with peace of mind.

The boy looked at the expression of the person in front of him, seeing if he was frightened, he was relieved, apologized and dragged the dog away

Zhou Nan thought for a while, then reached out to stop the car

"Hello, where are you going?" The driver pressed the vacant sign and looked back from the rearview mirror

"Nanshan Cemetery." Zhou Nan hadn't settled down yet, and was moving inside.

The back of the driver's neck felt cold, and his voice trembled, "Now?" All kinds of night shift legends flooded into his mind, and he pushed up the empty car sign again, "Sorry, I won't go there, you can call another one."

Zhou Nan stood on the side of the road and was sprayed in the face by the car exhaust. After realizing it, he called his driver to come

The driver was not afraid, he only thought that he was going to pay homage to his father, dutifully delivered to the gate of the cemetery, and would come down when the engine was turned off

"No need." Zhou Nan waved to him, "You just wait for me here."

The driver hesitated, "Aren't you afraid of the dark, why don't you bring a flashlight up there."

"If you have a mobile phone, don't be afraid." Zhou Nan disappeared between the arches of Nanshan Cemetery without looking back.

He is already familiar with this road enough to know where to go up a few steps and where to go down a few slopes. In the middle of the gentle basin surrounded by mountains, there is a lonely monument. Zhou Nan approached and sat on the ground.

"Mingjie, I originally wanted to come to see you tomorrow when I cleaned up, but when I was walking on the road at night, I suddenly missed you... I haven't had a good life recently, and my mother died, and she was buried in the tomb above you District, who died of cancer, suffered from severe pain for a year, and finally changed his appearance, not at all like her. I have no relatives at all... "

Zhou Nan rubbed the top of the tombstone, his palms were full of rough stones, without any warmth

"I used to hate reading poems the most, you know, I could cry when I recited the full text, and you scolded me, I can remember it forever... But suddenly one day, I saw a line of poems, only dreams of idlers, not dreams of kings... …It’s amazing, I’ve said everything I want to say. After that, I’ll read some poems and books, and occasionally find a sentence or two from them, and I feel that I’m not so lonely anymore... Why don’t you come to read it in your dreams What about me?"

"...Forget it, I know you have always been cruel, and you are always hurt by ruthlessness."

Zhou Nan stood up from the ground, and finally touched the photo on the stele, "I won't wait for you, I'll come to you. Walk slowly, wait for me." Sheng Mingjie in the photo just smiled, so gentle

Zhou Nan bent down, touched the photo with her lips, and left

The driver was waiting in the car, even though there was a light, he was still trembling. Seeing him from a distance, it seemed that 100 years had passed

"Mr. Zhou, shall I take you back directly?"

"Well. Go back."

Perhaps because of panic, the driver didn't notice Zhou Nan's abnormality, so he sent him downstairs, said hello and left

Zhou Nan went home, rummaged in the closet, put the will that had been prepared on the table and pressed it, and then changed into a formal suit, which was the one he wore the night Sheng Mingjie left five years ago

He brushed his teeth and washed his face carefully, stared at himself in the mirror for a long time, turned off the lights, went out, locked his keys, mobile phone and wallet at home, and only carried an ID card with him

The shaky figure has been on the cross-river bridge, jumped off at four o'clock in the morning, and disappeared into the river

Five years later, the Nanshan Cemetery was expanded, and the empty basin surrounded by mountains became the center of the entire cemetery, and the price even exceeded that of a house in the suburbs. a monument

Two young men are buried here side by side, the one on the left is named Sheng Mingjie, the one on the right is named Zhou Nan

This year, Chen Huai was not confused, and went to the class reunion again. There were only two people left in the complete dormitory. Shen Xutian brought a French boyfriend, who spoke Chinese like a Xinjiang native, and he himself sold the life His first high-priced work is called "Xi Yin"

It is an abstract painting with bold colors. It depicts four people, not very realistic, standing between heaven and earth, surrounded by mountains and seas, gentle, warm, sincere, and firm.

The former basketball player in the class was blessed, with a bald spot on the top of his head, and the lights shone brightly. He completed the transformation from Kaede Rukawa to coach Anzai. Holding his wine glass, he walked around the round table, Followed by his wife, the inconspicuous little girl who was always secretly said to be unsuitable, now after years, has shown a mature and beautiful charm, which is no longer what she used to be

"Hey, where did those two go? It's so easy to get together for a class reunion... don't give face."

Chen Huai stood up and drank a glass of wine, "Sheng Mingjie and Zhou Nan? They... have gone to live their own lives."

Both of them are carefree people, except for Chen Huai, no one knows the news of their death, it is better to let them leave cleanly than to let them become the focus of the gathering.

When others heard it, they believed it, and started the next lap

Only Shen Xutian pulled him to the terrace, cleared his throat, "What the hell happened to them...?" He had a vague premonition in his heart

"...Dead." After a long time of baptism, Chen Huai has been relieved, and can calmly look at Shen Xutian with red eyes

The light shines on the two of them through the mottled shade of the tree, and the picture seems unreal as if it is still. Chen Huai is leaning on a tree shadow, and at some point he has grown into the look he once dreamed of

"Some people don't change their original intentions, like you, some people's long-cherished wishes come true, like me, some people leave freely, like them... There are more people who have changed their appearance, thickened their bodies, and become parents who support their families and more lives... ..." Chen Huai pointed at the noisy crowd inside, his eyes traveled through a long time

"Zhou Nan left a note for us: Time is gone, we must cherish the shade. The sun and the moon will be wiped out, and the people with lofty ideals should wait for the dawn. In the last days of Zhou Nan, he became a cultural person, and he gave me a mouthful Chicken soup." Chen Huai smiled and handed him a tissue

"They've all grown up, those who leave will leave, and those who come back will come back... But, I will always stay here, waiting for you, waiting for you."

Qin Chuji came out from the inside, and was blocked by Chen Huai and pushed in. The two slender figures were submerged by the sunlight

There was mist in front of Shen Xutian's eyes. After a while, he wiped his face fiercely and went in.

The trajectories of life always seem to be different. 20 years ago, they started from the same starting point. 20 years later, some lines were broken in the middle, unable to continue, and some lines were weakly tested, but they moved forward firmly. After the intersection of , will there be another intersection?no one knows

Chen Huai later wondered if there was any difference between people or things that had appeared before and then disappeared, and whether they had never appeared before.He thought, yes, these are left in his memory and in his heart, and he inadvertently remembered that the slightly tingling nostalgia is probably the meaning of human existence in the world, and it is probably the difference between human beings and other plants and beasts. , disappear, and the remaining feelings will live forever in the hearts of the remaining people.

——End of full text——

The author has something to say: this book is finished, although not many people have read it, but thanks to the few readers who have read what I wrote

thank you very much!

bow!