[Shenya] Aphasia

Chapter 21

"Are you leaving?"

Alian stepped on the step ladder, with the mobile phone under his shoulder, and put the sorted books on the upper shelf of the wrought iron bookshelf in the front hall, then took out two pieces of camphor wood from the gauze bag hanging on his wrist and stuffed them into the pile of books.

The spring rain fell all day yesterday. Today, the temperature dropped sharply and there were few tourists. The newly reborn "Windermere Fairy" would inevitably close the store for renovation.

The boy lowered his head slightly while listening to the phone, his lowered eyes made it hard to see his expression: "Li Nali, I didn't expect this...too sudden."

"Alian, I'm sorry for him," the girl sighed deeply on the other end of the phone, "I can't be like you, there are more important people to me besides him. Am I... am I an asshole?"

"Since you're already a jerk, let's ask one more question," Li Nali said before Allen could answer, "Allen, if it were you, what would you do..."

Allen opened his eyes wide, and a hardcover book in his hand leaked out and fell to the ground.

"...If you also had a happy family, would you still give everything and even your life to Kanda like you are doing now?"

"Oh my God, I'm sorry." The girl covered her face over there, "Don't answer."

I can't figure it out.

I have also tried to imagine what a "happy family" looks like countless times. I am confident that I can imagine it because I have witnessed countless models from TV or reality over the years.But once its protagonist fell on my head, my brain immediately went blank.I can easily imagine myself being drowned by Mitarai balls, but I can't imagine my parents, because when the faces of those two people appear in my imagination as "parents", I will no longer feel happy.

My best friend, how much I want to tell you that your choice is not wrong, and you don't need to blame yourself-but now you may not be willing to listen to this kind of consolation like shirking responsibility.

I am glad that I can hold on to my lover and not let go, and you should also be proud of sticking to your happy family.

"He said he wanted to show me the world."

Li Nali said in a low voice: "He recommended me to the co-crew of "Eyes of the World" as the heroine of the documentary. It will start up next week, and it will last for a month. Me and him, there is still one month..."

She became quieter and quieter until she said nothing at last: "Allen, I really envy you..."

You see, this is my most important friend.She always has the ability and courage to make choices that minimize the harm, and I am so proud of her.

She is about to go on a honeymoon that is destined to break up.If there is a God in this world, I will pray for her to have a happy journey.

"I suddenly admire Allen."

The rabbi squeezed the empty beer can in his hand and threw it into the trash can three meters away.

"It's just a broken relationship that is about to push me into hell. How did he survive so many... as an ordinary person, he should not have suffered misfortune? You see, the ill-fated family and love, and all the injustices in the world are overwhelming. On his head, he is still so tenacious."

"Allen, he's so gentle." He put his arms behind his head and looked at the almost transparent sky after the rain, bitter in his mouth.

"He never vents, and he never seems to need comfort, because he is not willing to hurt even a single plant or tree in this world. Even at the moment when he is closest to collapse, he only hugs himself. But I am not that kind of saint, so Sorry, you have to listen to my bitterness."

"No...it's actually an excuse."

"When a person walks to that hurdle, as long as he has one breath left, he will push himself to cross it. No matter how much you complain about the disaster or pain that falls on your head, you still have to bear it after all."

"Li Nali...it's the first time I have such an idea. You know, we are all used to looking for various people to experience love when we are young. Only when we reach the age when we feel that we have had enough fun will we consider finding someone who is pleasing to the eye. But she told me that they don’t think so in China, and most of their girls have the hope of spending a lifetime with each other every time they fall in love... She is very serious and treats me.”

"It makes me feel that although we have little hope, I don't want to play anymore. I want to marry her and let her get what she wants... Haha, how can it be so easy to be destined in this life? There are not so many people in the world like Allen and A You don't need to worry about exotic romance like Yu."

Crowley was dumb, and couldn't say anything comforting, so he reached out and rubbed the young man's red hair.

This young man entered the magazine a year later than him, and he never lacked energy and creativity in every minute of his post. He had never seen him so dejected.If it is normal, let Crowley judge, this person is someone who never needs comfort.

Rabbi raised his head, and the Old Trafford stadium behind him was upside down. The dome surrounded by white steel frames is still mighty today, but it has been exposed to the sun and rain for a hundred years. Dreams and losses, now few people call it "" Dream Theater".He seemed to be overwhelmed by some sense of frustration.Beckham and Ronaldinho will still come, Owen and Luis Figo will still come, but the stadium seems to be old. Manchester City, which hosts the European Champions Cup, is old, and he, who was born here, is probably old too.

"... sir, sir!"

The rabbi retracted his neck and shook his head.In front of him stood a blond boy as tall as his knees, staring at him with wide eyes.

"Sir, your headband is so cool!"

"Oh? Do you like it?" The rabbi took off the hair tie, bent down and handed it to him, "If you like it, I will give it to you."

The boy looked at the hairband carefully, then at the man, and held up a five-pound note in his hand: "I have money. I earned it by cleaning the garden of my neighbor, Granny Hans. I can buy a pair of hair like this by myself." bring."

When the rabbi saw him stubbornly holding up the crumpled green bill, he felt inexplicably better: "But you can't find a headband like mine, it's unique."

"Ah..." The boy showed a dejected expression.

"But I can sell it to you, because it's an old thing, so I'll give you a discount."

Crowley watched dumbfounded as his friend sold a leather headband to the boy for three cucumbers, and took two pounds of "change" out of his pocket and put it in the little hand.

"If I remember correctly, you said it was a famous product that you managed to find from Switzerland."

"So what? Just go shopping again!"

The rabbi smoothed his hair and let it hang down naturally, and said loudly with a smile.

Crowley tilted his head and thought about it, which seemed to make sense, so he also smiled: "Yes, this is the rabbi I know!"

Do you remember what I should be like?

I lost myself when I parted ways with my loved ones, I lost myself when I was chasing love, and I lost myself when I was left on an island by disease.When I opened the window, the pendants on the curtains were blown by the wind and collided with each other, making a pleasant sound.I drowsyly thought about what I should do in the afternoon, the sheet music to practice... I don't even know what I'm insisting on, and my consciousness has never been so vague.

Mana came over and asked me how I was doing today, and I told him it was fine, God knows I had slept for more than three hours.I figured I should give you a call to tell you about my recent situation, but I felt that I had nothing to tell you.Besides, you must be busy too, you don't have time to chat with me, maybe you will scold me, I don't want to ask for trouble.

A battery that wears out too many times will naturally become less durable and require more and more recharging.

Although I seem to be quite positive, I am not a very hopeful person.

Now I only hope that I can live up to myself, and I hope that I can also live up to you.

"I bought you a cod and a cabbage at the morning market by the town, a total of four pounds. After finishing today's practice, I will make fried fish for you. By the way, I often come to drink flower tea recently The old gentleman praised you to me just now, saying that the sound of the piano sounds very beautiful now."

Manner put the bag on the bar, probably feeling the cold, and zipped up his coat.The smooth piano music came from behind, indicating that the days of practicing with Allen hand in hand would be over before he knew it. He closed his eyes and listened carefully to the music.

Half a month before the performance, Allen learned the piece—not so much learning it, but interpreting it according to his own understanding.He changed a lot of places to make the melody more suitable, but this also made it more difficult to get in touch with the team.Under Mana's strong request, he had to leave Lake District Park early and live with the band in the urban area.

Miranda Lotter was waiting for them to arrive on the train platform in person. She smiled when she saw Allen: "At first I thought you wouldn't come, but Mr. Campbell said it was an excellent choice for you to participate."

Allen was a little embarrassed: "I'm sorry for making you worry."

"We got in touch with Miss Wax Flower, and she promised to wait until your performance is over before undergoing surgery, but you have to be checked on call. But if you need surgery, guardian..."

"I'll find a way." Allen looked directly into Mana's eyes.

"Are you still going to find her? Do you know where she is?" Mana looked back in surprise.

Allen nodded and was about to answer when the phone rang.

"excellent."

"..."

"Hello...you?"

"You bastard, if I don't make this call, you'll never get in touch with me?"

Allen scratched his hair and laughed dryly: "Really? I forgot."

Kanda snorted on the phone: "Shouldn't you be careful? If I don't swear at your ex, it's the greatest tolerance."

True.

"Well, thank you..." Allen thanked earnestly, then thought for a while, "Hey, are you making a fuss?"

"...Going to London, I've become a lot more beaten up, bean sprouts?"

Allen laughed out loud, and his ears were hot: "Actually, I miss you very much. I miss you a lot. If I think about it, I won't be able to fall asleep. If I can't sleep, just think about it. It will be over soon. I can do it well. How about you?" Are you ready?"

Without waiting for an answer from the other side, he continued: "You've done well, you're better than me, except for your bad temper..." He took a deep breath, looked around the crowd coming and going on the platform, and landed on the Far away, "No, you have a better temper than me, you have always been better than me."

When he turned his head, Mana and his group had already stopped a taxi. He hurriedly carried his luggage and ran towards the waiting platform, making an apologetic expression to everyone, but he did not hang up the phone.

"The recorded song was sent to MSN, have you listened to it?"

Kanda was silent for a while: "I have heard it."

"Oh...how is it?"

"From a layman's point of view, fine."

Alian pursed his lips, but couldn't tell whether it was a compliment or a loss.

"Aren," Kanda called his name suddenly hesitantly, "If a person feels uncomfortable... I can ask the teacher for leave..."

"No." Allen interrupted him loudly, "If you dare to come, I will beat you."

Kanda chuckled.He was lucky to be rejected by Allen, otherwise he would not only be embarrassed but also disappointed.After all, he is no longer the stunned young man who would throw away his return ticket and take the train in the middle of the night to meet his lover, and at some point, he also began to have more expectations for Allen.

God knows how much that guy wants to be a fearless and free person, and every accent in that song expresses his desire, which is surprisingly fervent.He thought for a while and said, "Bean sprouts, it's not good for you to be so eager."

Allen ignored him and turned his head to the side: "The speech is over, you can do the surgery again."

"I know." Kanda said, "Don't mess it up."

Hearing this, Allen frowned and muttered something in a low voice, but Kanda didn't hear clearly, but he didn't care about it unexpectedly.

"By the way, do you remember the pot of lavender planted in the backyard last year? I went to see it, and it bloomed early."

Allen certainly remembered.For that plant, he often quarreled with Kanda, because the two of them rushed to water the root system and wilted due to lack of air, and because they were worried that it would be damaged by freezing, he moved the flower pot indoors and filled the ground with dirt, which angered the person in charge of cleaning that day Kanda, the plants were flooded because they forgot to pull down the canopy on rainy days... That was the period when they were the most arrogant, they could quarrel over any trivial matter, although it always ended in nothing or the two of them wrestled on the bed , but next time they will still insist on arguing again.I don't know if it was nourished by this enthusiasm, but the lavender plant that grew in the backyard of a family in rainy England has miraculously bloomed early.

The boy's eyes filled with tenderness when he was thinking this way: "Really? I really want to see it."

"After you finish what you should do, come back and see for yourself." Kanda lowered his eyes, "But the flowering period is not long, you have to hurry up."

"Oh?" Allen tilted his head, "I will."

After putting down the phone, Kanda stretched his eyebrows.On the screen of the mobile phone that was not in standby, the last call was 6 minutes ago, and the note was "Mother".

Even if there is no smooth road ahead for us, at least there is a road worth looking forward to; if there are too many obstacles blocking us on the road, then remove them one by one.

-TBC.