bedroom literature

Chapter 65 He Is Suffering Itself

【Yagyu】

Liu Sheng stood up, turned around and left.

"Why don't you want it all of a sudden?" Jiang Qiwen chased to the corridor and asked.

Yagyu:?

"Your characters," Jiang Qiwen explained, "feel like you've given up on them."

"There is no hope, there is no good result." Liu Sheng didn't turn his head back, "Look at the archangel, he will return to his own group sooner or later, and his group will only... Everyone wants to trap him for their own selfish desires, And the only brother will only use him for weapons."

His mother did come to look for him. When school started, by the artificial lake on campus, she squatted down to Liu Sheng after school, and pulled him over in the dark.

She asked him to steal another file when he got back.

She said that when it was done, they would all be free.

She said that she used to be sorry for him, as long as this last thing...

He listens, listens.In the end, tears welled up in his eyes, and he ran away like crazy.

She did not catch up.

"Do you know why the age on my ID card is one year later?" Liu Sheng asked him.

That poor woman, as a victim was forced to become a mother.She spent a year hesitating whether to have an abortion.After giving birth to Liu Sheng, she regretted it again, and she spent another year thinking about whether to kill Liu Sheng.

For two years, she was heartbroken.She decided to make a fortune with the child.

But most men are always generous only to unacquired partners.

"Do you know why my physique is poor? Why does my body not improve after exercising for so long?"

Because the woman is not satisfied with the alimony for basic necessities of life, she starts to pay attention to the medical expenses.

He suffered from various illnesses, such as freezing cold, food poisoning, neurasthenia caused by poor sleep, and abnormal blood pressure... He didn't know that most other children didn't have to experience these, and these were actually avoidable.His mother would take him to the county hospital to see a doctor, and the doctor issued a list, most of which were lost.It was only once that he had a bad fever and was dying. She was afraid that the money tree would not be able to survive, so she really took him for an injection.

She will be irritable if she can't get the money, and she will calm down for a while only after getting the money. Sometimes when she is happy, she will buy him some biscuits or marshmallows.

However, it often collapses that night.She hugged Liu Sheng's shoulders, shaking and repeating frantically: "This is what you owe me, this is what you owe me..."

He gritted his teeth and stood still, without saying a word, telling himself that it would be fine to get over it.I just kept looking at the snack bag, afraid that my mother would repent and take it back.

She hated Liu Sheng, just as Liu Sheng couldn't love her with all his heart.His body has formed a certain conditioned reflex, and he deserves to be able to exchange biscuits when he is sick, so he does not thank her.In fact, Yagyu didn't feel much most of the time, and sometimes he hated her, but only when his mother broke the promise again and again and took away the rewards given to him.His only consolation is that he once picked up a rabbit and hid it in a small shed with a pile of broken wood. The small shed was shared by the neighbors, so he could keep it quietly all the time.He kept the rabbit in captivity, looking at the scarlet but numb eyes of the rabbit, his heart was touched a little.

It's like a person who has been living a lie and suddenly looks in the mirror.But waking up would only increase the pain, so he stood up immediately and left.

No one said love, and no one believed in each other's promise and future, but there is always a thread connected, which will never be broken, and neither of them can give up.

She tormented him, and after gaining brief pleasure, she sank into greater torture, such a vicious circle.

Until one day, a pot of meat was stewed at home, and I was told that I could enjoy it as I wanted.After he was flattered to have dinner, he fed the rabbit as usual, only to find bloody fur all over the place, and there was a hammer from home next to it.

He ran back to question the woman about the rabbit's whereabouts, but the woman didn't lift her eyes, she casually pointed at the leftovers on the table.

Liu Sheng bent down and vomited faintly.

The next day, he walked for a long, long time with those hairs in his bag, and came to the city.The police took him to his father's house.He didn't care about those decorations and luxuries, what he cared about was his father's concerned gaze, and his solemn promise, all of which were too dreamy, making him think that he had returned to his real home.

However, a new nightmare has begun.The morbid and extreme control made him feel suffocated. When he knew that the servants here had to record how many times they went to the toilet every day, he realized what kind of purgatory he had come to.

When he fled to the village again, he didn't wait until daylight, and set off in the middle of the night.As a result, he was arrested at the train station.

The man showed him a video of how Liu Sheng hails a taxi and asks for directions, and finally played a video of... the indoor video of his village home.

Sure enough, she couldn't escape his eyes.

Mother has gone.

where to?

have no idea.After all, it is not to find yourself.

Life seems to have sucked.The man watched them rot together, enjoying and delighting.

But this empty home seemed to have completely liberated the woman.

There is a reason why Liu Sheng can act calmly in front of those classmates who look down on "sissies".At least he didn't owe them any.

Compared with indebtedness, malice makes him feel more at ease.

【Jiang Qiwen】

Jiang Qiwen listened to those words quietly, feeling horrified.

When Liu Yu mentioned the family of the Archangel, he vaguely guessed that it was about his family.But he didn't expect the reality to be so absurd.

Rabbit fleece, rabbit fleece.

He suddenly thought of the origin of the "rabbit fleece vending machine" that Liu Sheng had told him in the private message at the beginning——

"At that time, I imagined that I had a snow field, and I shared all the snow with friends who had never seen snow. It was a bit naive haha."

"Is it for memorial service?" Jiang Qiwen asked.

"Snow field? Did I say that?" Liu Sheng smiled again when he heard him recite the private letter from a long time ago, "Don't over-interpret it."

Liu Sheng's casual smile made his eyes sour.

"I just thought," Jiang Qiwen said, "that there is a kind of ceremonial thing at funerals, which is white paper flowers hung in strings on wooden sticks, called Xueliu."

Liu Sheng said, "That's really a coincidence."

Liu Sheng's expression made the words he said before attack Jiang Qiwen one after another.

"I am a person who grew up in the dark, pessimistic, twisted, and underestimated myself."

"I'm so envious of open-minded people like you. I want to be influenced by you, so I want to get closer to people like you. If I get closer, it seems that I can be labeled as the same kind."

"I hate promises. I think they are like street lights when we came, far away, always give you hope, but can't illuminate your feet."

Jiang Qiwen felt that the person in front of him was able to stand in front of him with a smile, and he had exhausted all his strength.

With such an experienced life, how can he have the strength to believe in illusory promises?

What's more, I have also deceived him for a long time...

When Liu Sheng asked himself over and over again, the gender of the object of his sexual fantasies, and his feelings when reading other works, and got the wrong answer over and over again, how should he feel?

A life that has been abandoned twice, and a broken mood again.

"You don't have to be responsible for your momentary sensibility." He even comforted Jiang Qiwen from Jiang Qiwen's point of view, told him to distinguish between desire and reason, gave him the example of a giant fish louse, and earnestly told him not to be deceived by his own brain.

Liu Sheng said that he envied himself for his magnanimity, but Jiang Qiwen now felt that Liu Sheng was a thousand times stronger than him.

He was like a superman, who walked in front of him after crossing thousands of mountains and rivers, showing a tired smile.

"Can you tell if it's desire or a quick, high-conceptual judgment?" Yagyu said. "I seem to have asked you that. But I don't have an answer myself. I'm sorry. I always think that the essence of intimacy is that a person never What can I gain from another person? Is it very utilitarian? I also think... I may not have the ability to love a person.

"Am I attracted by the light on your body? Or do I simply want to vent my desire?"

Yagyu slipped into the pessimistic world again.

"Do you think," Jiang Qiwen asked, "do you need a reason to love someone?"

"...too profound," Liu Sheng closed his eyes, "I don't know."

"Today is actually the two weeks we agreed on. I will report to you about my dragon slaying class." Jiang Qiwen hesitated for a while, and said resolutely, "Do you want to hear it?"

Liu Sheng was taken aback by his resolute look, and seemed a little frightened, "I'm a little tired today."

For some reason, he seemed to have touched his dark roots today.

He became afraid to look at Jiang Qiwen.

"Tomorrow is the final of our debate," Jiang Qiwen was not discouraged, "Will you come?"

"Tomorrow..." Liu Sheng was puzzled, "I might go out of school to do some errands, but I don't know when I will be back."

"I'll wait for you." Jiang Qiwen said.

Liu Sheng nodded slightly, and wanted to get out of the dormitory.

Jiang Qiwen followed him with his eyes, watched him go, and finally chased after him and called him to stop.

Jiang Qiwen said: "If fallen angels are the ancestors of demons, it means that angels are not good things. According to what you said, it is indeed the case. Since archangels are born so beautiful and have a kind nature, it just shows that the so-called good angels in this world are all good." It is false, demons are beautiful but vulgar, human beings are ignorant and narrow-minded, and only archangels are the chosen true gods.

"He transcended suffering, he was suffering itself.

"He was not abandoned by the world, but the world that abandoned him is not worthy of him. As long as he is still him, he will eventually create his own world.

"Yayuu-san, you are a crack in my world, with a huge subversive effect. You broke me, tampered with my reality, and monopolized my right and wrong. I will not let you go easily like this.

"If you give me 100 years, I will use 50 years to pull you up from the quagmire. If not, I will go down to accompany you."